Toojays Blog

A True Story

No this isn't a ghost story or management theory on conflict management...although both can be pretty scary!

This is infact a true story.

Yesterday I took my 9 year old daughter for an eye operation. The procedure, of being sedated, operated on and her eye ball stitched, would be daunting to most let alone a 9 year old little girl.

Whilst waiting with her I asked how she was feeling. She said scared. I asked if she'd been this scared before...hoping to help her relate to an experience and how she came out of it OK.

She replied with "Yes...the first time I went to school...the first time I went into the classroom. I wish I knew how things were going to be."

I smiled and agreed with her. Then to my surprise she pulled out a piece of crumpled paper and said "That's why Daddy,  I've got these".

"What have you got there?" I asked.

"These" She said proudly "are my questions to ask the Doctor!"

Excellent set of Questions

She unfolded the piece of paper and I could see she had written in her best handwriting the following question's.

1. What will happen?

2. Will it hurt?

3. What if it goes wrong?

4. Are you a good surgeon? (OK she'd actually written 'sturgeon' but we knew he wasn't a fish!)

"An excellent set of questions" I told her...and the attentive Surgeon dutifully answered all of them as he sat with her pre-Op.

His calm reassuring manner and answers put her mind at rest and reduced her fear.

Her actions and particularly the reference to her previous classroom experience got me thinking about how do we as Trainers handle the fears of our delegates?

Lessons for all trainers

Do we take the time to explain:

• The process? "What will happen?"
• The engagement needed "Will it hurt?" 
• The benefits or consequences "What happens if it goes wrong?"
• Our Credibility as the trainer "Are you a good Surgeon?"

So check your introductions...are you addressing these fears?